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| BASIC ADVICE TO TACKLE WORKPLACE BULLIES |
You are unlikely to make a bully see the error of his ways as bullying is most likely second nature to him (called egosyntonic) - he is "in denial". It is usually a waste of time even trying. Chief bullies frequently have an incurable personality disorder. Bullies are commonly narcissistic and are often referred to as control freaks. They use a psychological defense mechanism called "projection" to offload their own failings and sense of shame onto the target. They claim that the target is to blame and he is the victim. They use scapegoating and even engineer failure by the target by setting them up to fail. Others may get taken in by the bully's manipulative charm and delusions - even some psychologists. The only way you are likely to beat a bully is to get support from someone who has leverage and authority over the bully thus putting the bully back in his box. Bullying can be overt and/or covert, where covert bullying is "passive-aggressive" behaviour. |
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| EXCELLENT ANTI-BULLYING WEBSITES |
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| EXCELLENT ANTI-BULLYING BOOKS |
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| EXCELLENT BULLY PSYCHOLOGY BOOKS |
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| 25 TOP WORKPLACE BULLY TACTICS |
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Workplace bullies use many methods to intimidate their targets. Based on studies of toxic workplaces, the Workplace Bullying Institute has identified 25 of the Top Workplace Bully Tactics employed by workplace bullies (see here).
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| WORKPLACE MANAGERS OFTEN WORSE THAN CRIMINALLY INSANE |
In 2005, psychologists Belinda Board and Katarina Fritzon at the University of Surrey, UK, interviewed and gave personality tests to high-level British executives and compared their profiles with those of criminal psychiatric patients at Broadmoor Prison in the UK. They found that three out of eleven personality disorders were actually more common in managers than in the disturbed criminals, they were:
They described the business people as successful psychopaths and the criminals as unsuccessful psychopaths. This research was published as "Board, B.J. & Fritzon, Katarina, F. (2005). Disordered personalities at work. Psychology, Crime and Law, 11, 17-32" There is a strong correlation between the existence of bullying and personality disorders (see here and here). |
| NARCISSISM AND WORKPLACE BULLYING |
The bullying phenomenon fits in well with the psychological theory of narcissism (see here). Narcissists are particularly attracted to managerial roles. Narcissistic managers expect his or her subordinates to provide narcissistic supply, thus helping to support his or her deluded false sense of self. He or she likes to be surrounded with sycophants who can be relied upon to do this. The true self of a narcissist is that of a flawed and inadequate person. The false self of a narcissist is a perfect superior person who can do no wrong. Narcissistic managers are often referred to as control freaks. Narcissistic rage is synonymous with bullying and allows a narcissist to offload his sense of shame and negative feelings about himself by blaming others and deluding himself of his natural superiority. This process is known as psychological projection. A narcissistic manager often treats gifted subordinates and peers as a threat, and are envious of them, by virtue of the risk that their abilities will expose his or her inadequacies. Narcissistic injury can be triggered by criticism (or any perceived slight) of the narcissistic manager which in turn causes narcissistic rage. This is because the criticism has reminded the narcissist of his true self of which he is in denial. Narcissistic rage can also manifest itself on an ongoing basis as serial bullying where bully targets are selected who have perceived vulnerabilities. The negative impact of a narcissist on a target is likely to result in loss of self esteem, depression or post-traumatic personality disorder etc. |
| PSYCHOPATHY AND WORKPLACE BULLYING |
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In the book Snakes in Suits : When Psychopaths Go to Work, the authors Robert Hare and Paul Babiak discuss psychopathy and workplace bullying thus: "Bullies react aggressively in response to provocation or perceived insults or slights. It is unclear whether their acts of bullying give them pleasure or are just the most effective way they have learned to get what they want from others. Similar to manipulators, however, psychopathic bullies do not feel remorse, guilt or empathy. They lack insight into their own behaviour, and seem unwilling or unable to moderate it, even when it is to their own advantage. Not being able to understand the harm they do to themselves (let alone their victims), psychopathic bullies are particularly dangerous.” "Of course, not all bullies are psychopathic, though this may be of little concern to their victims. Bullies come in many psychological and physical sizes and shapes. In many cases, “garden variety” bullies have deep seated psychological problems, including feelings of inferiority or inadequacy and difficulty in relating to others. Some may simply have learned at an early stage that their size, strength, or verbal talent was the only effective tool they had for social behaviour. Some of these individuals may be context-specific bullies, behaving badly at work but more or less normally in other contexts. But the psychopathic bully is what he is: a callous, vindictive, controlling individual with little or no empathy or concern for the rights and feelings of the victim, no matter what the context.” |
| BASIC TYPES OF WORKPLACE BULLYING |
Dr Tim Field Identified the following basic types of workplace bullying (see here):
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| MEDICAL NARCISSISM |
| Medical narcissism is a term coined by John Banja in his book Medical Errors and Medical Narcissism. He uses the psychological concept of narcissism to explain the culture by which many medical practitioners downplay medical errors and often avoid taking personal responsibility. He claims this is part of the dehumanization of the patients from the practitioner's perspective. John Banja provided evidence that there is a higher incidence of practitioners in the medical profession with narcissistic personality disorder than the general population, and that there is a resultant general narcissistic culture in the medical profession of self-righteousness, arrogance, and denial. |
| This website explores the relationships between bullying, abuse, mobbing, psychopathy and emotional intelligence in various contexts. It is uncompromising, but I believe honest. My understanding is from first-hand experience, discussing the issue with hundreds of bully targets and studying many sources.
EQ can matter more than conventional intelligence (IQ). Daniel Goleman's sequel book, Working with Emotional Intelligence, amongst other things vindicates my view that the Information Technology industry seriously lacks EQ. Particularly with increasing globalised competition, it is emotional intelligence, not technical expertise or superior intellect, that matters most for success. There are clear signs that EQ is becoming mainstream, for example:
For bullying, mobbing and EQ, an extensive list of related website links are included. There are also many books readily available on these subjects; click on the following for starter lists:
There is too much control in this world. Oppressive control is a psychopathic trait. As Louise Porter says, "More crimes against humanity have been committed in the name of obedience than in the name of anarchy." An interesting idea is the extension of democracy to companies, education and parenting. This could be considered to be applied EQ. Democracy is an ideal middle ground between authoritarianism and permissiveness. It allows rights with responsibilities, self-discipline rather than imposed discipline. A person subjected to an authoritarianism regime often swings straight to permissiveness as a rebellious reaction once the regime has been lifted. Authoritarian regimes can cause other problems such as damaging self esteem, causing stress, stifling creativity and originality. |